Risperidone Quetapine Lithium carbonate Olanzapine Fluoxetine Flupenthixol Citalopram Venlafaxine Clozapine Mirtazapine Haloperidol Aripiprazole Sertraline Amitriptyline Lorazepam Diazepam Temazepam Zopiclone   Are all the medications I can remember taking over the past 10 years in services (there’s probably far more). We’re told medication will relieve symptoms and make us better – which isn’t the case for […]

The Second Admission

Psychosis is like how I imagine a floatation tank to be; sensory deprivation and then every sense working overdrive, stimulated by the tiniest of noise or sensation, dragging the stuff of nightmares out of the darkest depths of the soul. Generally the dark shit isn’t part of the floatation tank experience, I’m guessing; but it’s […]

“You Shouldn’t Speak Ill of the Dead”

Some people say you shouldn’t speak ill of the dead; personally, I think people should tell the fucking truth. Yesterday I saw something on Facebook dedicated to a guy I ‘dated’ briefly. It was about how wonderful he was, how the world was missing a great mind and that life isn’t the same without him. […]

psychosis is stealing my identity

For years BPD has been part of who I am, what I identify with and something I feel I have understanding of. It’s what my job roles are based upon, it’s how I understand myself. It’s not what defines me as a person but it’s a just part of how I make sense of the […]

I’ve Got This Fucking Thorn in My Side…

Its 2am. I am 30 in 6 months and I still have the emotional range of an 8-year-old. I wear the same sort of clothes I did 10 years ago and definitely have not aged mentally beyond the age of 17; I got my lip pierced while on leave last week…  I’m listening to Beastie […]

The Silencing of SUI

There seems to be a growing number of clinicians using social media to reach out and share their knowledge with the wider world; or are they? What I have come to realise is that the internet, Twitter in particular is full of passive-aggressive charlatans claiming to be the truth, the way and the life of […]

Ward Life

I’ve been on the ward just over a week.. It’s been enlightening. From the oddities of other inpatients, the monotonous structure of each day, crisis and interesting team dynamics.   The first day came and went quietly for me but there was one quite unwell woman that did a lot of shouting, banging and attempting […]